Where we wrestle with the sublime, mysterious, powerful and often frustrating paradox of God's necessary grace.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Grace and the Jell-O of Ego

Good question: What am I doing here, in this blog?

I know my stated purpose: To examine grace in our lives, although so far it's only about my life. You haven't really shown up yet on radar.

So, again I ask: What am I doing here on this blog? Am I really throwing grace down on the table and wrestling with it or am I just jerking around like a pithed frog?

And you, Dear Reader--why are you here? What do you get out of reading my posts? Is it entertainment or something less or something more? I'm asking because I really, truly don't know.

I started this blog with the semi-gelid expectation it would become a popular (yeah, "popular"--so I have an ego...) port of call for believers wanting something chewy and wholesome in a sea of evangelical meringue. I didn't want it to be an endless whine nor a happy-clappy, Jesus-is-my-boyfriend brain fade.

I'm not thinking of folding my tent here, I'm egotistical enough I won't walk away from self-promotion, no matter how ugly.

So, if you're reading this blog, and you're getting anything out of it, positive or negative, would you please do me the kindness of telling me? Thank you.

8 comments:

Jackie said...

Hey Ken

I clicked on the link in your SoF sig, because I always did like your writing. I have your blog in my feed reader so do read each entry, but the last few I haven't commented as I struggled to get beyond platitudes. But [platitude alert] I've prayed for you as I've read - what else can I do?

I also like that your wrestlings with these issues help me to see that God is worth wrestling with. (Don't know if that makes sense). Am going through a long dry spell in my faith at the moment, with God not feeling very tangible. So seeing someone else's real tangible (albeit messy) journey with God is helping me too. Thanks Ken :)

Jackie (Jack the Lass from the Ship)

Scot said...

It's pretty simple really. I care about you and your well-being, and this is where you introspect on your life. I come here to understand how my amigo Ken is doing.

As an added bonus, you sometimes give me something interesting (chewy!) to contemplate.

Jonathan said...

Ken,

I found your blog because of the Ship, I'll pm you there and let you know who I am.

I put your blog on my blogroll, because it's an honest, earthy, funny and sometimes inspiring place to think about grace in a graceless world.

Grace and peace
Jonathan

(p.s. my verification word for this post was "fumblygym" that sounds like an interesting place...)

KenWritez said...

Scot and Jackie - Thank you both for your lovely comments. I needed to hear them and I have. Please, never, ever doubt the power of an encouraging word, no matter how mundane or inconsequential it feels to you to say it.

Scot: Your friendship means much to me and I value it because not only do I like you tremendously (and the lovely T., too!) but I've always respected you as someone more concerned with truth than with being right or--L. Ron forfend!--being popular.

Jackie: Thank you for your prayers. I covet them and ask you please continue them. I understand soul drought and struggling with offering platitudes. Take this for what it's worth: I've learnt what you say matters so very little compared to saying something at all.

Even a platitude has a grain of truth in it, and the love in which you offer it burnishes that grain until it sparkles like diamond.

To hell being hip. I'd rather offer someone a heart-felt platitude and a platter of warm brownies than sit in my tomb waiting to be cool enough to say the hip thing.

People who are hurting don't give a damn what you say, they just want you to be there in the first place with your heart in your hands. That's all that's important.

Both of you with your words have given me of your love and that's a precious thing. Thank you! :D

I wish you both were here so I could cook for you.

KenWritez said...

Hey Jonathan;

Thank you for your kind words! I appreciate them. :)

Jackie said...

You want to cook for me? I'm on the next plane over! (PS I'm vegetarian :D)

Hope the evil food poisoning disappears soon and you get to enjoy Christmas with your loved ones. My best wishes to you and the Sturdy Wench, and prayers and hopes for a grace-filled 2009.

KenWritez said...

LOL Jackie.

I'm feeling much better this morning. Thanks for your kind thoughts.

Let me know when your plane is due in. I'll grab Alice Waters' vegetarian cookbook and I'll lay out a spread for you.

emifriend said...

(((Ken)))))